“But what if……?”

What if?

This question can raise doubts and uncertainties but also wishful thinking and desires.  So which one do you tend to lean towards?

The “what ifs” that came from uncertainty do a great job of increasing anxiety and holding us back. We can get caught up with imagining the worst case scenario and then we panic, avoid or withdraw, never taking the chance to test the waters.  This type of thinking can be our default setting keeping us firmly stuck, not going anyway, too afraid to try things out. We make assumption about things that have yet to happen but take action upon those assumptions often in fear and anxiety.  These two words can be incredibly powerful and can really hold us back.  They have a lot of backing from our past experiences and belief system making it easier to let the “what if” rule our life.

So how can we reduce the power of these words?  As with most changes we need to be in a place of awareness.  We need to capture our thoughts and listen to what we are saying in our heads. Once we realise we are saying “but what if?” then we have the opportunity to challenge.  We can challenge the thought by directly asking the opposite “but what if it DOESN’T …..?” By doing, this we give our self permission to think that there may be alternatives to our worst case scenario.  That with every possible negative outcome there is also a positive one and it is ours to choose. Which option would give us the greater enjoyment/achievement/happiness? Am I willing to take that risk?  That is for you to decide and to make clear rational choices that are not hampered or influenced by the “what ifs” of the past.

You can turn the not so helpful “what ifs” into empowering and liberating thoughts, allowing yourself the possibility of success and achievement.  Dare to dream the “what ifs” free from fear and low confidence, worry and doubt. When you get to this stage in your thinking you have already started to unshackle the chains of negativity and have given yourself permission to explore the endless possibilities that await you.

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About karen812

Personal Development Coach and NLP practitioner, I specialise in managing stress, communications skills and confidence building. I work with individuals but also love working with groups, running workshops and doing presentations.
This entry was posted in Belief, goals, motivation, Resilience, therapy. Bookmark the permalink.

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